A good watch provided you can stomach the gross talents and tremendous football IQ of one Alberto Aquilani.

Totti 3 – Bari 1

I do not envy Roman journalists in the least. One could offer me the gig with world peace as compensation and I would swiftly decline despite the desperate pleas of humanity. How could one possibly spend ten years fumbling through thesauri looking for the words to aptly summarize his latest heroics? The man is every superlative in the book. It’s just not fair.

I don’t know what else to say. Clearly the magic of Francesco’s returning mane and Mirko’s moustachio manifested some sort of celestial power which teleported two unfit players back into their vintage selves.

Or maybe they’re just that fucking good.

• I find it pretty impossible to criticize any game featuring such an incredibly dominant first half. A Roma we have not seen in some time, and that’s in no small part to the inclusion of a tried and true attacking tridente of wondrous technical abilities. (And by “tried and true tridente” I do not mean “tried and true tridente” – just three out and out attackers.)

  The second half was a kink; residue, if you will. Hell, the game might’ve even ended in the 20th minute. It was classic Spalletti’s Roma: come out in the first half to declare your superiority and run up the score; take the pedal entirely off in the second half.

  Hopefully Ranieri will tweak this a bit such that they turn out for some complete 90 minute trouncings, but that first half was nuts for the winter, ladies and gents. Let the masterpiece be.

• Julio Sergio will from here on be known as The Enigma.

  How? Three years. How?

  (He will also be known as AS Roma’s starting goalkeeper from here on out.)

• Just for the record, Mirko’s mustache scorched right past its obvious ridiculousness into the pantheon of awesomeness, much like he scorched Gillet. Or Barreto scorched Andreolli. Consideration as anything but such will be punished by forty lashes with Ahmed Barusso’s detached leg.
• One of the few players who was poor either side of the half was Andreolli. I gather consistency won’t be a forte of his for a bit yet, so let’s hope this was the off day which rendered itself a nonfactor. After all, he was so damn good against Inter, he was due a dropoff.

  Also: he could be outpaced by a painting. I’m not entirely sure teams which counter at pace are his best matchup just yet – not while he’s perfecting the mental art of central defending.

• I love the balance of three centerbacks anchoring three attack first forwards up at the top if but for one thing…

  …there are three goddamn rightbacks on the roster already. Balance and points are good, but once Cicinho hits fourth on the depth chart, I smell a diva rightback turning into a locker room issue. Again. And this one can’t make us almost forget about it with supernatural back post powers and laughable hair.

  The likelihood that he is unloaded in January is not what I’d call bedrock low.

  (Also worth noting the absence of a certain beastly defensive mid may have played a role.)

• It’s also worth noting that the first half was, while maybe not the best, was Roma’s most dominant in perhaps two years. The possession percentages was somewhere in the range of the average Fahrenheit in Abu Dhabi in the summer, I gather, and it so easily could’ve been five or six to nothing were they interested (Mirko was centimeters away from a second minute opener, Menez mishitting half-open net, Gillet’s save on Totti, etc).

  And this without Daniele De Rossi. Simpler, and thus more accurate, short passing game? I’ve heard worse theories.

  (Blasphemy, I know.)

• Yet another thing worth pointing out is that while they were so dominant, they didn’t have to be entirely brilliant across the board. Brighi, Perrotta, Pizarro – none lit the world alight in that first half, as easy as the Sunday stroll was. Which is partly down to Bari being less than the starved lion.
• Whichever Bari forward was pickpocketed like a clueless stock broker by Mirko down that lefthand side should’ve woken up this morning, gone to the club offices and retired on the spot. That’s embarrassing – Mirko looked like a mid-90’s Maldini.
• Little stat to enjoy. Totti in 09/10: 19g, 13gm.

  There’s no other way to describe that but stupidly good. And South Africa-bound.

• I believe I said this at the time, but there was a Bari corner in the first half between the second and third goals where Simone, Brighi and Riise got back into positions which would’ve had the world class likes of Juan and Mexes look the part of amateurs. Brighi headed the cross away before it could get a whiff of Simone’s mark, whose pocket he was foraging in at the time, and the danger, despite being beaten for pace, was swiftly snuffed. I still claim that the best move of the game and don’t doubt for a second Ranieri’s Roman fingerprints were all over it.

  The corner counter was an extraordinary weak point when he came. Now? I dare ya – I double dare ya.

• You might have noticed that Taddei is one of the only players left with an expiring contract which has not been renewed. This may have something to do with the fact that he wouldn’t make the podium in the Special Olympics 100m right about now – and they give medals to everyone.

All in all, a great first half mashed with a less than optimal second half which combined to produce a good win and some much needed points against a trickily good club. Oh, and a matinee from that Totti fellow.

This feels a bit like a pat on the back for awareness, but I’ll say it anyway: I’m so glad I don’t take Francesco for granted – that I’ve never taken him for granted. That I hang on his every move, often times with heart suspended and still in mid-chest, and find myself on the edge of my seat watching, waiting and not wasting a moment. Hell, by the half on Sunday I’d contorted into some ungodly position on the floor which would’ve blushed the already rouged cheeks of a Cirque du Soleil artist, simply so that I could get close enough to the screen that nary an errant move darting into camera range would go unloved.

It’s the best of kinds and it’s the worst of kinds. It’s so good it hurts, because this, we know, will not last forever. Don’t waste a moment.

He doesn’t.

Roma v Bari

There’s a game in less than 12 hours. Pass the word.

Squad

Andreolli
Baptista
Bertagnoli
Brighi
Burdisso
Cassetti
Cerci
Cicinho
Doni
Faty
Guberti
Menez
Mexes
Motta
Okaka
Perrotta
Pizarro
Riise
Taddei
Totti
Vucinic

Assenti: Juan, De Rossi

XI

Julio Sergio
Motta, Mexes, Burdisso, Riise
Taddei, Brighi, Pizarro, Perrotta
Vucinic, Totti.

Roma News says it’s so.

I recommend night-long candle light vigils and as many rosaries as possible between now and game time. This is not a good idea.

Trophies are nice, but I don’t want to scream my lungs out – I want my breath taken away. I don’t want to bear witness to arms held aloft; I want to bear witness to singular moments of genius. The singular moments which turn generations into followers and followers into believers. Belief in the grand design. The grand design that in this world there does exist The One. The complimentary piece which completes every human being. And proof that it needn’t be a woman for a man or vice-versa, and it needn’t be based on sexuality. That sometimes, The One is simply there for the betterment of mankind, not for the enjoyment of individuals. I want these moments to reach down into the bowels of my lungs and rip every last breath from my body. To replace that breath with the silent screams of faith and hope and wonderment. I want singular moments which provide affirmation that there is a God.

If one needs proof of that I suggest looking no further than the video below.

ones

A much championed fight in the press. A crippled Roma lying wounded; a captain in the stands and another at the hospital by the half; an impromptu leader on one leg; a game with more dodgy fouls than rollerderby. And yet….

Two points lost, not one point gained.

Mirko, Mirko, Mirko….how could you.

Under normal circumstances, the lofted goal counts as five in the hearts and all is forgiven. Not here. Yes, he was so far beyond Roman bodies no one could tell him Lucio was marching up his backside. Yes, he made the right move and left Julio Cesar for toast. But it’s different at the San Siro. Have to bury that. Every time. You cannot leave chances on the table, because Milan teams will turn those chances into a point or three. Sunday, a point; next time it’ll be three. (Unless Rosetti is involved. Then it might be the first ever five point victory.)

The Mirko we know and love buries that first one and strips down to his Scooby Doo underoos in front of the Interisti. Unfortunately he’s only just making the long trek back to being Big Game Mirko.

With that said…the goal made babies in Montenegro.

And then there was Mourinho. Unfortunately – and we don’t get to say this often about Mourinho’s tactics – what he did worked. To perfection, in fact, and likely beyond his wildest dreams (those not involving Franky Lamps in the shower, anyhow). Let’s cut his bullshit about resting weary players and call a spade a spade with an international break on the fore: he sent out football’s Thug Unit to make sure it wasn’t football at all. Muntari, Motta and Vieira were out there for one reason and one reason only: to break Roma down physically. That they did, and nearly beyond anything Roma could withstand. Daniele’s face was broken and Philippe Mexes was forced into calcio’s version of the Curt Schilling moment with that eerily reminiscent bloody sock and subsequent heroic performance*. Roma’s two best players – with Philou back to being Philou and what have you – down to .5 and some dazzling hair.

* – Diego Milito would like out of Philippe’s back pocket now. It’s been two years and he’s got enough lint to sop up the tears now.

And so they did what they had to: put on a defensive clinic and lived by the counter. Classic Ranieri, in other words. And it, much like Mourinho’s vision, worked to perfection, even when the parts were less than ideal.

The defensive line was, by and large, brilliant. The plaudits have rained down on Mexes & Andreolli, deservedly of course, while Motta’s rise from just-below-garbage to just-above-awesome was just as vital, but let’s talk about John Arne Riise. Give me Riise versus Maicon & Balotelli and I’m taking to the basement head in knees. Did anyone expect those two to be so supremely out-dueled? Nay. He had help, sure, but this was a Norwegian stranglehold on Inter’s strongest flank by some margin.

Unfortunately my guess is that Riise often plays best against better teams as he’s less apt to fancy himself a goddamn prima punta (see: Mexes, Philippe) and thus his positioning resembles that of, gasp, a defender. Expect Bari not to go as well.

The subtle performance of Matteo Brighi belongs on a shelf in the manor. This was 08-09′ Brighi. Somewhat flying under the radar, but so necessarily vital – so necessary it needs to be said twice – to any sort of defensive formation with central solidarity. He was arguably the best player last year once the 4-3-1-2 variation made its cameo. I suspect it will become no different here: Matteo’s niche has been discovered. Whether Ranieri chooses to go this route more often remains to be seen, but it’s a sign and signs are good.

Simone Perrotta brought back visions of ‘06, at least on the back end, the highest compliment he can be paid. Daniele was Daniele for the mere moments on the pitch. But there was one man who above all laid the defensive foundation for this game. Who flew in to challenges with the graceful panache of a circus mule. Who found every dirty ounce of desire and willed it into a furious fireball of South American wonder.

David Pizarro. Go back and watch the game. Watch every moment a vital intervention is made before Mexes, Andreolli & Co. are forced into action. Every time a play was made he was there, doing some ungodly thing looking straight out of yoga for the handicapped. And it worked. Somehow, he was there.

Chilean midgets, ladies and gents. Chilean midgets.

words

I have decided I hate numbers. Words are better.

Julio Sergio: You starting goalkeeper. It’s been said over and over again, but it’ll be at least once more: Doni is like a cat and Julio Sergio is like a person with the brain. Yeah, the cat’s going to do some incredible things, but every once in a while it’ll scratch your face and shit on your carpet.

Go with the brain.

Now a question: if Luciano Spalletti is such a visionary, such an incredible alchemist, why in the name of all that is holy did it take three @#$&ing years to give Julio Sergio a start?

Perhaps Luciano saw the performance against Juve and resigned out of shame.

Motta: I genuinely have no idea where this rollercoaster is going next. He might push for Zambrotta’s spot on the Azzurri, or he might get roasted like poultry against the Coppa equivalent of Kosice (Lazio?). Ride it while it’s hot, pray it stays that way.

Andreolli: Simone Loria could probably lap him in a feet race, which isn’t so good, but he makes up for it with a fair bit of agility and a toe poke that’ll earn him a few penalties and a few Azzurri callups.

It’s been years and years since saying this, but here goes: Roma can start any combination of the four centerbacks possible, and I’ll still sleep soundly the night before for any.

Mexes: Heroic is a word, but I like typical Mexes best.

Riise: See above.

Tonetto: Good sub, did his job, and damn do I miss vintage Max Tonetto. Perhaps the only player on this roster whose identity is still wholly sitting in the 4-2-3-1 Spalletti era. He’s almost a symbol of the era, if you will. More than Totti, Mancini, Taddei, Perrotta, Panucci or anyone else, because as soon as the system died, so did Max. Two years ago he notched rougly 1,200 games, now he’s scrapping for cameos as the face of Roma, as well as age, has changed so much.

I look forward to Riise’s first suspension just to relive the days of a bombing Tonetto overlapping and whipping crosses.

Brighi: The bread and butter of any defensive formation. Sure, Daniele’s a defensive wizard, but Brighi fills all the gaps. Filling gaps are good, or else other people fill them. And if your wife has ever cheated on you, you’ll know that’s bad.

Or maybe you can decipher these things without life-crushing infidelities. Whatever.

Perrotta: Good.

Daniele: Better.

Pizarro: Best.

(This is what happens when you set the bar low.)

Faty: I suspect it was Moratti who replaced his studs with rollerblade wheels.

Mirko’s was the far more glaring opportunity, but if Bambi here could’ve stayed on his feet he might’ve iced it as well. Everyone’s calling Ranieri’s tactical decisions spot on, but I’m calling bullshit. He clearly should’ve left Tonetto on the bench and subbed in some proper shoes for Ricardo.

Menez: When Ranieri first showed up in Rome, it was thought Menez’s days were numbered. Claudio the defensive disciple and Luciano the attacking visionary, Spalletti’s strengths seemed to mesh much better with Droopy. Then there were the fights, the non-calls, the snubs and the benchings. Everything pointed to Menez as the first January casualty.

And now this. Not only is the talent shining through, but all the other stuff is vanishing. The diving? Nigh gone. The boy actively tries to stay on his feet now. The laziness? He actually ran off the ball this weekend. Who knew? And the vision? My, my, my.

The boy’s a bit special. And, incredibly, it’s been Ranieri bringing it out. Who knew?

Okakachukamuthafucka: Speaking of boys who are a bit special…if Mirko’s goal made babies, Stefano would’ve made Italian families of Nigerian descent had he scored on that run from midfield. The skill and pace for a manchild his size is staggering. This one could be the answer to all that ails.

Mirko:

Mirko

Mirko

…

Inter v Roma

Best news you’ll hear up until the game: they aren’t supposed to win.

Which really makes it fun, eh? Inter are in good form; Roma are not. Inter have a fully fit squad; Roma do not. Inter are at home; Roma are only sorta at home. Classic nothing to lose game.

Good personnel news: RomaNews is trumpeting the midfield of Brighi, Pizarro, Perrotta and DDR in rhombus form. At its heights, the finest midfield Roma can offer.

More good news: for the very first time ever, I checked the referee before checking the squad list…just to see if it’ll be Roberto Rossetti. It won’t. Another piece lessening the tilt a bit.

The almost bad news, not quite good news: no Doni no party. Are we at the point where Julio Sergio is a wash with Alex, if not preferred? Can’t speak for the fandom, but I’m damn close. Doni may be part feline, but Julio has a full set of chromosomes. Push.

(Gun to the head, however, and I’m tapping Doni on the shoulder.)

The bad news: no Totti, but you knew that already, lessening the sting.

The real bad news: they’re not in good form. At all. Bologna wasn’t convincing; Fulham, though they did precisely what they should’ve against ten men, was still against ten men. And they’re still just two weeks off a loss to Livorno at home. Hopefully this is enough of a bullseye to pull everything together, but a great deal of things must be put in the right places in order to be tightly bound.

The really bad news: no Juan, no Burdisso. Not entirely sure whether Burdisso would’ve played if fit – the gentleman’s agreement with playing against the contractual club and whatnot – but it’s still a loss, as you can be damn sure that backline would’ve read Burdisso, Mexes, Juan, Riise if all were fit. (At some point it will read a sexy Andreolli-Mexes-Juan-Burdisso this year, I guarantee it.)

Some less than ideals coming at the wrong time against the wrong team in what may or may not be the right place anymore. So all they must do is play like they have nothing to lose. Because they don’t.

Squad:

Andreolli
Artur
Baptista
Bertagnoli
Brighi
Cassetti
Cerci
Cicinho
De Rossi
Faty
Guberti
Lobont
Menez
Mexes
Motta
Okaka
Perrotta
Pizarro
Riise
Tonetto
Vucinic

XI

Julio Sergio
Motta, Mexes, Andreolli, Riise
Brighi, De Rossi, Pizarro
Perrotta
Menez, Vucinic.

RomaNews likes Ranieri to outfit that rightflank with Motta; I nominate Cassetti until Ranieri gives us a reason to think otherwise. The rest are largely personnel by default in a 4-3-1-2 situation.

FORZA ROMA

Roma 2 – Fulham 1

The English will have you believe this was about the referee. But with the benefit of video replay we have seen…

i. The intentional handball in the first half on the ball to goal was a red card and penalty.
ii. The red card in the second half was not.

So they cancel each other out and a penalty is left on the table. Pretty decent swap if you ask me.

(A win is a win is a win these days, right?)

GAME

Baptista skirts one wide. Fulham with one last throw, nothing done.

That, admittedly, was a pretty poor call. But Roma were just playing the keepaway game and it has little effect on this game.

Straight red for Konchesky for a tackle on Taddei, who sells it like Rodrigo Taddei.

Two minutes added.

Menez with a streaking Taddei makes the poor choice and shoots. Still a bit of maturing to do.

87′ Zamora goes to ground quite easily in the box, wants a call, none given.

Okaka goes for an audacious bike from outside the box and Schwarzer forced into a leaping save.

86′ Fulham now pushing numbers as they have little choice here.

Okaka so nearly beat’s the line, but he’s learned a bit much from that Mirko fella.

Now a Fulham corner. Danger is in the air….Julio punches like a proper keeper should.

83′ Menez gettin’ fancy, Julio plays it back to yeremy down the line who is stonewalled.

Fulham have a free kick with Mexes tugging at Zamora’s shirt. Poor decision.

82′ Okaka holding up down the line…waiting for the reinforcements and it’s back to holding Fulham hostage in their own end.

80′ Having missed the entirety of the last 5 minutes, the danger here is sitting back happy with a 2-1 win. Must press Fulham still. Cut their throats.

Epic server problems coinciding with Okaka’s goal. Who cares.

OKAKACHUKAMUTHAFUCKA. That is prima fucking punta. Header right into the back of the net.

Another corner is another goal kick for Fulham. This 5th referee thing isn’t working out splendiferously, is it?

Fulham under the impression they can attack and do, eventually Riise nabs a free ball back for possession.

Daniele goes tit for tat with Riise which was a clear corner but the Europa League 5th ref botches it, giving Daniele a yellow.

70′ Zamora is on and Fulham win a corner back down the other end on an offbalance clearance.

Training ground play as he’s left all by his lonesome outside the box to unleash his fiery blaze of a left foot. What a peg that man was gifted.

RIIIIIIIIIIIIISE. What. A. Hammer. 1-1.

Deflected up for a corner.

67′ David wins a free kick in Riise territory…as though everything isn’t Riise territory.

65′ A leaping Julio puts it wide.

Goober off for Menez. Very well played by Stefano.

64′ Now Taddei whips in a shot for corner….very weakly taken low.

And here comes the locksmith: Menez..

63′ Rodrigo fires a cross of his defender, which is an enormous help.

61′ Ironically, Roma are playing the far more physical game of the two.

Julio makes some space but fires it directly at Schwarzer on his lesser foot.

59′ Dempsey enjoying some falling over.

58′ Love Guberti, so much fight, as Okaka has a touch of Baptistaesque disproportions.

Two red card things:

i. Don’t you forget it came mere minutes after Taddei entered the pitch, eh?
ii. Karma for the handball late in the first, methinks.

A gaggle of corners….Guberti plants one off Pantsil’s face. Stefano has jolted to life.

55′ Server difficulties also not helping today….Guberti tries to make my dave better but tipped up and over by Schwarzer.

54′ Very nice win by Okaka to save possession….Guberti again with some pace to save possession. Making camp in the Fulham thirdd….Cassetti header behind the net.

52′ Corner Roma…lots of possession now…Baptista with a cheeky soft volley into the side of the net.

There were three angles shown: two a red, one which showed it wasn’t. I suspect the ref saw one of the two.

49′ Professional foul by Gera to snuff the attack. And not Nevland with a quick red for taking out DDR from behind.

48′ Lots of running around chicken/head style.

SECOND HALF

And I don’t care if Doni is actually part cat, sell him. Now. His stupidity cripples this team time and time again, as with a wasted sub here.

Cicinho, after creating the best chances of the half through his crossing, coming off. Don’t get this one bit. But then that’s the want of Ranieri.

Rodrigo Taddei and Julio Sergio coming on. Fucking. Awesome.

I quit.

Certainly not as poor as they’ve been recently, creating enough chances to get something done surely, but not putting them in the back of the net. And, to be fair, this could so easily be 1-1 on two penalties right now.

Knowing Ranieri he’ll make a halftime sub, but I’m not seeing one necessary at the moment. Seem to be putting a few things together. (Outside of, perhaps, Motta for Cassetti.)

Had the good fortune to review that handball in slow motion – he actually stuck his hand out to stop the ball from going to the net. The gripe is less with the referee and more about the lack of video replay in football.

HALFTIME

44′ Doni hurt himself unnecessarily juggling the ball with an attacker steaming down. Unfuckingbelieveable.

And a Dempsey shot skirts just wide after Andreolli failed to clear. Bit worried about his confidence here.

43′ Another Cicinho cross comes in which Okaka heads well wide. Still, nice little run of chances.

Short ball played, Mexes’ shot hits the outstretched hand on the way to goal but no call. Everyone wants the penalty but it was bulleted too quickly.

Okaka does brilliantly to dribble with two defenders and his shot is deflected for a corner…

41′ Andreolli in a tough position made a nice little tackle to clear an easy chance for an offside Dempsey.

40′ You know, I’m starting to think that Ranieri is truly bizarro Spalletti: instead of a second half letdown, they don’t quite fully show up for the first half.

Gorgeous touch and pass by Julio to create a chance down the Fulham end and David drives a shot which Okaka can’t escape from in an offside position soon enough.

37′ Kamara heads a completely open header – tough angle admittedly – nowhere near net as Okak risks a red card going studs up high, but only a yellow.

36′ JRiise with a vital interception cutting off supply to the goal. Very vital.

35′ Cicinho’s cross turns into a harmless shot, but it’s clear he’s miles above anyone else on the team at whipping balls in right now. Missing Tonetto a bit, actually.

34′ Yellow card for Greening for improper use of hair.

33′ Riise is having a field day against Cassetti; little surprise.

And Clint Dempsey blows a 1v1 with Doni by allowing the defense back into the equation.

Cassetti whips a ball into Baptista when he should’ve left it short for Okakchukamuthafucka.

28′ More than the scoreline, a bit worried what this does for Andreolli’s confidence. He may be necessary on the weekend and conceding such a clear penalty cannot help.

26′ Guberti has become the main avenue of the attack, which isn’t all that effective with so many bigger Fulham bodies in the box ready to clear crosses.

Mexes whistled for making a clean tackle after Briise smoked Cassetti.

24′ Oh my, Mexes goes inches wide of the post with leaping, gliding header. Shoulda woulda coulda.

23′ Cicinho is wearing some odd apparatus on his right leg, presumably to prevent injury and/or being good at defense.

22′ More stream issues.

18′ Kamara scores. 1-0.

Clear penalty conceded by Andreolli. Hero to goat in a moment.

16′ Incredibly, Hangeland wins the physical battle between himself and Pizarro. It would appear David could not slay Goliath this go ’round.

Training ground play to Goober is blocked.

15′ B. Riise punches Cicinho in the face, free kick from 30 won.

14′ Baptista and Goober have a moment of misunderstanding – obviously not having spent much time together, what with Stefano avoiding the trainer’s table and all.

13′ Guberti, immediately after the British commentary mention his onefootedness, skirts one with the other foot towards Okakachukamuthafucka and it’s cleared to win a corner. So ha.

12′ Fulham looking at an early sub. Ranieri should also be forced into at least two first half injury subs.

11′ Julio with something resembling a proper footballer’s touch, so that’s something.

9′ TVU is popping in and out, but was fortunate enough to see Daniele block a shot and Cassetti’s side part.

7′ Slight stream issues, unfortunately.

5′ Cicinho is in midfield as Baptista finally meets his match in the giant Norwegian Hangeland.

4′ Ah yes: extraordinarily clear and extraordinarily small.

Okaka with an early offside ever so slightly.

Here we go, rocking TVU through atdhe.net.

KICKOFF

Busy looking for a stream whilst they kickoff…

Streams: MyP2P; atdhe.

(I warned her.)

Stefano ate a small Filipino family and is storing them in his thighs.

Official XI

ROMA:

Doni
Cassetti, Mexes, Andreolli, J.A.Riise
Cicinho, Pizarro, De Rossi, Guberti
Okaka, Baptista

A disp.: Julio Sergio, Motta, Taddei, Perrotta, Cerci, Brighi, Menez
All.: Ranieri

Love this lineup, particularly the men up top. And I wouldn’t be surprised if Cassetti and Cicinho swap places.

FULHAM:

Schwarzer
Pantsil, Hughes, Hangeland, Konchesky
B. Riise, Etuhu, Greening, Gera
Kamara, Dempsey.

A disp.: Stockdale, Baird, Nevland, Anderson, Smailing, Davies, Zamora.
All.: Hodgson

The game is in 40 minutes, apparently. Goddamn Uefa Cup start times.

“I have always said I want to stay at Roma. It’s a discourse which relates to my life and the day I became a Romanista, not based on trophies, or who the club buys.”

The continuing legend of Daniele De Rossi.

Squad

2 CICERO JOAO DE CESARE (CICINHO)
3 MARCO ANDREOLLI
5 PHILIPPE MEXES
7 DAVID MARCELO CORTES PIZARRO
9 MIRKO VUCINIC
11 RODRIGO FERRANTE TADDEI
13 MARCO MOTTA
16 DANIELE DE ROSSI
17 JOHN ARNE RIISE
19 JULIO CESAR BAPTISTA
20 SIMONE PERROTTA
21 STEFANO GUBERTI
22 MAX TONETTO
24 ALESSIO CERCI
27 JULIO SERGIO BERTAGNOLI
32 DONIEBER ALEXANDER MARANGON (DONI)
33 MATTEO BRIGHI
77 MARCO CASSETTI
89 OKAKA CHUKA STEFANO
94 JEREMY MENEZ

Indisponibili: Juan, Burdisso, Totti, Faty.

XI

Doni
Cassetti, Mexes, Andreolli, Riise
Taddei, De Rossi, Pizarro, Perrotta
Baptista, Vucinic

You know the Europa League drill.

Bologna

Struggled forever finding any words to sum up this victory. Not talking about le mot juste – just le mot. And then it came from the strangest place. The Dark Knight happens to be on Home Box Office at the moment, and I’m finding it highly appropriate as Harvey What’s-His-Two Face would so quintessentially sums up la magica in name alone. These days, those days, every days. Bipolar as ever, two sides of the same coin as ever, two-faced as ever.

My head, mostly by the manner which they went about achieving this valuable triangle, was throbbing throughout the entire thing and thus I misremember much of the game, but this is what I unmisremember – both sides.

Good: Mirko Vucinic & Simone Perrotta got their first goals of the Serie A season.

Bad: In November.

Good: Mirko Vucinic did not mess his pants on a sitter.

Bad: In the last 97 minutes of football against Bologna, Mirko has three goals. So maybe he just likes playing Bologna.

Good Simone Perrotta also nailed a sitter.

Bad: This probably fills his quota til March.

Good: They won.

Bad: It was very, very ugly.

Good: A rightback returning from injury looked good.

Bad: A rightback returning from diabolical form finally put together some decent form. And then got injured for roughly the 29th time in the last three games. (Fuzzy maths, but ballpark or thereabouts.)

Good: Philippe Mexes is starting to look like…Philippe Mexes.

Bad: The same goes for his hair.

Good: Matteo Brighi’s current form could send last year’s form a postcard and it wouldn’t arrive until next year.

Bad: His agent shut up real quick, eh?

Good: David Pizarro gave his full approval on the coining of David Pizarro Syndrome.

Bad: See above.

Good: Fitness, we suspect, puts him off the hook. (Though you could put him back on the hook if you just picked him up and placed him on a coat rack.)

Bad: So has anyone else seen an athlete in great form while haggling for a contract, only to swandive immediately after receiving said contract? Me neither…

Good: Jeremy Menez is smoother than Casanova on silk sheets.

Bad: Much like Casanova, he’ll tantalize and then disappear for long stretches. Might call, probably won’t.

Good: Marco Andreolli is turning into a pretty nice footballer, giving Roma a helluva centerback foursome.

Bad: It’s by necessity, as Juan was officially created by odd blowing techniques from a long tube.

Good: Whoolio Baptista’s touch did not resemble a trampoline.

Bad: I don’t even have a snippy snap here – that was actually pretty goddamn sweet. I must be out of rememberings.

And remember this guy?

Roma v Bologna

I like triangles. A lot. One after another…

Just win. How about that? Just win.

Squad

Andreolli
Antunes
Baptista
Bertagnoli
Brighi
Cerci
Cicinho
Doni
Esposito
Faty
Greco
Guberti
Juan
Menez
Mexes
Motta
Okaka
Perrotta
Pit
Pizarro
Riise
Vucinic

Assenti: Burdisso, Totti.
Squalificati: De Rossi, Cassetti, Taddei (2)

XI

Doni
Motta, Mexes, Juan, Riise
Cerci, Pizarro, Brighi, Perrotta
Menez, Vucinic.

Streams: MyP2P; atdhe.